What the married (or soon to be) seem to forget...

I dont know what it is that makes me just so irritable by everything lately, but I was reading a blog and it insensed a rage within that has been unequalled within the last few years.


What is wrong with being single? I know this goes against every Concordian doctrine ingrained in our minds by years of evangelical endoctrination, but honestly, whats wrong with being single? This may be a breach of faith, but what if I dont want my life to be dedicated to "being fruitful and multplying" or at least thinking that that command means marrying with a five peice quartet playing Jesu of Joy's Desiring while a baraige of women I dont really know all that well walk down an aisle with flowers (symbol of love and life) that just die anyways, and the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with is so stressed out about "her big day" that she forgets that fact of why we are getting married (namely love and committment) maybe even forgetting my participation in the event, and that our first day as a couple might mean me dealing with a bride-zilla or having to patch up family and friend conflicts because the someone losened their tie before the appointed hour.


Maybe its not an issue of faith that makes me so mad. Its the over commercialization of it all and the sense of obligation to have a wedding that "The Knot" will feature on their website, and the sheer stupidity of spending over $30,000 on a four to five, maybe six, hour event becomes commonplace and even the expectation where we lose sight of everything.


But I degress, as the pomp and circumstance of a wedding isnt what makes me mad. Its your perrogative if you want to take our refinance your life for a single's day event (or, in a sick twist, make your parent's do it). When will being single be okay? When will married people start to realize that they too were once single, and those years that they look upon with disdain and regret are eventually the years they remember fondly after tens years of sheets being stripped away from them in the middle of the night. When will they realize that many people are choosing to live in the realm of darkness and pity that is singleness, from which, they thankfully have fled. When will they realize that they were once people who received those "horrible plus one wedding invitations for single people"? When will they stop having pity on singleness, like its some disease that they have recently been cured from?

Dont get me wrong. I want to be a married (no $30,000 weddings here, please) but I also realize that my future state of married bliss in an evloution of my singleness, and maybe that is why I am so worked up about this. We are so worried about getting married, and making the distinction between "those horrible single" times and our wedded bliss, that we dont develop our own interests apart from selecting tux colors and picking out processional peices. We dont become people outside of what we think our future wife might want us to be. I want to have a wife and a family, but this complete disregard for the circumstances (namely singleness) that are the natural environment for those things to develop, this complete dedication to a marital pursuit just seems ridiculous.

Read some philosophy. Think. Become a person. If you are single or married or divorce. Forget about that. Worry about being a person, your own person, and dont put yourself on a pedastal becuase you have a ring around your finger. Marraige is not the vehicle of existence, so stop making us single people feel like we are missing the "breath of life" it brings.